"I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk ..." Funny Birthday Card
This 5" x 6.825" funny Rickell birthday card is perfect a friend who's aging like fine wine… or maybe questionable milk?
This witty birthday card delivers a laugh-out-loud reminder that age is just a number—unless you're dairy! This birthday card is the perfect mix of sarcasm and humor for anyone with a good sense of humor and an even better... an expiration date.
Outside reads:
"I'm not saying you're old, but if you were milk, I'd give you a sniff first."
There is plenty of blank space, because we know your witty remarks and heartfelt wishes deserve center stage.
Why They’ll Love It:
- Whether they’re hitting a milestone or just another lap around the sun, it’s a joke everyone can enjoy.
- High-quality 16pt glossy cardstock with vibrant, detailed illustrations.
- This isn’t just another generic birthday card; it’s a keepsake they’ll remember (and maybe hold against you).
- Ideal for the man or woman who loves to celebrate his/her birthday with a side of wit.
- It’s the perfect balance of cheeky and clever, guaranteed to make them laugh out loud.
- All Rickell Cards give you a little extra with a brief history lesson about the content on the back of the card.
CARD INFO
5" x 6.825" 16pt Cardstock Glossy Birthday Card
RETURN & REFUND POLICY
We guarantee our products 100%. If we make a mistake, we correct it free of charge every time. Products free of material defect at the time of shipping are not subject to a refund, return, or exchange. Please inspect your items upon delivery, and if we’ve missed an issue, please let us know within 30 days of receipt. After 30 days, we cannot offer a replacement or refund.
SHIPPING INFO
At Rickell Cards, we’re dedicated to ensuring your greeting cards arrive in perfect condition and on time. Please review our shipping policy for details.
Processing Times
- Standard Orders: Orders are processed within 1 business day after purchase.
Shipping Method
We offer FREE SHIPPING using the good ol' USPS. We take great care in packaging your order to ensure it arrives in excellent condition.
Your satisfaction is our top priority! Free shipping is available on orders within the lower 48 states.
FREE shipping DOES NOT come with a USPS tracking number, it is just like regular mail with a stamp.
Ah, good ol' regular mail with stamps (remember those)—our trusty sidekick in getting your hilarious greeting cards from our hands to yours. It’s like sending a message in a bottle with fewer pirate attacks.
Here's the deal: shipping is free anywhere in the lower U.S., but there’s a trade-off—no tracking number.
Need it faster and want to know every step of your card’s journey? For almost the value of the card itself, for only $3.99, we’ll slap on a tracking number so you can follow your envelope’s every move like a super sleuth. Either way, your laughs are on the way!
Also please note that first class shipping tends to be a little slower, usually an average of 3 - 5 business days.
Lost or Damaged Orders
We carefully package all orders to prevent damage during transit. However, if your order arrives damaged or goes missing:
- Please contact us within 7 days of delivery at rickellcards@gmail.com
- Include your order number and photos (if applicable) so we can resolve the issue promptly.
Contact Us
If you have any questions about your order or our shipping policy, feel free to reach out to us at rickellcards@gmail.com
Thank you for choosing Rickell Cards! We’re honored to be part of your special moments.